Don't Pause to Breathe When You Read This..That's How I Would've Said It!!!

I am restless with a purpose. i feel this way when i have a challenge that's unfinished. Like a testing deliverable that i have to sign off and the creator knows more about the module than I know because I'm not really from that team but they weirdly made me team lead there what the hell?? and since my real team's TL is on night shift, im backup team lead in the morning and even if everyone else has lots of idle time i feel that my hands are full from managing 2 teams.. altho relatively, my schedule is still very normal coz it's still within eight hours, consolation! ahh! i need to study the functionality of my new team! crazy crazy

Talking to my Blog

Aldrich and I will be going to Tagaytay tomorrow for our 'summer' outing. We were supposed to go to Wonder Island but changed our minds because of the weather. It's scary to ride a boat to an island during strong winds and high waves...so off to Sonya's we go! We'll also have merienda at Bag of Beans. Aldrich can't wait to get his hands (or mouth) on the apple pie again. It's his absolute favorite!

Right now, I'm still researching on another place to go to in between Sonya's and Bag of Beans. I'm thinking of the Flower Farm, also in Tagaytay. I considered People's Park in the Sky first but it might be dirty and there were some negative comments in Virtual Tourist.

I just need to get our itinerary in place then I have still some other things to think about...
1) I've decided to take Bikram Yoga Classes - Thought Level 9. This has a dependency to # 2 though
2) Actualization of Finances - I did get my last pay but I dont' want to splurge coz I already paid my dad 20k out of the 48k.
3) I'm planning to invest around 10-15 k from my remaining 25k. My sister-in-law, Gwen, suggested that I invest in one of Philam's plans; she recommended this and has also put her own money and kids; money in the plan. I still have to contact her sister Grace so she can tell me how it works.

Recently, I feel I've become more family oriented and less rebellious. (Slowly saying goodbye to teenage rebellious phase! 6 years late!) I have Aldrich to thank in part since he's a super family oriented guy - this he made clear - ala expectations setting - when we were still starting out.

I've also found it easier to participate in Church activities coz I see my parents, especially my Dad getting involved in them, too. I never imagined this would happen, but as we know, nothing is impossible with God!

I've attended a couple of Wednesday career group meetings and our newly transferred pastor, Bro. Kervin is really a great speaker and motivator. Attending the meetings openend my eyes to the wrong notions I had about faith and Christianity (sheesh, after all these years!), and also made me ponder about the status of my relationship with God.

One of the most important eye-openers to me is that the basis of our faith, of our being a Christian should be Jesus Christ. No one else, nothing else. Our faith in God should not be based on feelings alone. For example, I often say "I'm not in the mood, I don't want to go to Church anymore "or "I'm sleepy, so maybe I'll pray later or read the Bible next time". It's not something that we do when we're happy and comfortable and have extra time. It should be part of our life. It's not a religion, it's a way of life.

I've never really thought of it that way and the more I attend the meetings and mull over things, the easier it is to follow the 'pathway of life' (this is the title of the book we're reading). Of course, it will take time but what's important is the willingness to follow it and for the rest, God's grace will suffice.

It's such a pity that I have classes on Wednesdays and Thursday this term! I've rechecked the schedule but there's no other good date option. I'll miss our meetings and practices as well :( .

I Have a Life!

I have a life!

I realized I have a life after attending my friend Cathy's baby shower! I haven't seen or spoke with this friend for like 3++ years. We worked together in the airport during the modeling days!

I am also able to meet up for coffee with my high school friends who work around Makati since I now get out of the office at 'normal people' time. Wow! I didn't realize that going home early from the office and not rendering frequent overtime and not equating your life with work would have an effect of such a great magnitude to my life!

Wow, I can now say that I have a life!

The best thing right now is not only having a life but also getting paid higher for the same things that you do before.

Way cool!

All's Well That Ends Well

All's well now... Aldrich and I are both on normal shift. He's experiencing the 'adjustment week' syndrome I had during my first 2 billable weeks... the super-charged but tired feeling and temporarily shifting into a morning person.. but that too will pass! I know so, hahahah!

I was just looking at my current company's outing photos and it looks so much fun! But just coming from a different company, we couldn't help but compare company organized outings.

Old Company
- GP2W Organized
- A sponsor project is chosen to help in logistics, food, games, etc.
- basically, it's very organized!

New Company
- HR Organized
- everyone is to just enjoy and have fun!
- there are games and activities but not everyone was compelled to join

The not-so-good things we encountered were waiting to check in to our rooms.. like a 2 hour wait? and waiting to check out of our rooms..like an hour wait on the bus..and it was 1pm but we still hadn't had lunch and when we did a stopover, there was a sudden change of venue coz some person from another bus called to say that paseo de sta rosa had more options.. oh yeah but they were in a hurry and told us just to take out our food. Huwat? how can you say that to hungry and grumpy people? Our heads were shaking, tsk tsk.

What we enjoyed though was the free time and not having to account for where you are. We were even able to get out of the resort and ride a tricycle to the town market to buy some pasalubong fruits, kakanin and pies. That was nice :)

Courtesy. Check your phones.

Can Your Relationship Survive the Shift?

I'm on day shift again after my 1 week night shift stint.. but Aldrich is still on night shift - but they were promised that it would only be until this week.

Why can't I just be a logical person and stop whining? I just sooo hate it when he's not around. Sigh. One week na lang.. bakit hindi ko pa makayanan? Am I that weak??

Apparently, yes. I'm trying not to be....trying....

"There are a few who can manage long-distance relationships successfully, but for couples that work in the same office but never meet, the tale is very different. They find it harder to meet and even more stressful to stay awake longer than required, upsetting the balance the body constantly strives to maintain." - Craig D'Mello

"Be sensitive to what your partner is going through when he works the night shift. This will make life so much easier on both of you" - Christie Silvers

Closing Time..Finally!

I never really believed that there was such a thing as 'closure' from really confronting your problems..

I was more of an escapist kind of person who believed that memory loss or time would make everything fine

But i've experienced it myself and now i'm a believer!

Night Creature for a Week

I volunteered to be on night shift for the whole of last week and it was an enlightening experience-

I learned that I'm quite a nocturnal person. My shift mate would fall asleep but i was always awake and alert. Of course there are bouts of sleepiness, but nothing like thesis-times' head-dropping-to-the-keyboard kind of thing.

I guess it also helped that whenever i felt any signs of a major sleepiness attack, I'd have my mini-Nescafe mixed pack in hand: Nescafe Gold, Nesacafe Decaf, and Nescafe Protect. To complete that is Nesvita Non-fat powdered milk and my packets of Splenda Sugar substitute (This is not an Ad) hahaha!

And all in all, night shift isn't that bad (at least for me) especially since our work is not tedious. We're just running batch jobs and validating output files which is simple and mechanical. Not much brain cells are needed unlike when creating Test Case requirements, you'd have to map lots of documents and spreadsheets in your head.

Starting Monday, I'll be back on normal creature shift already and will be looking after my teammates during the day. By some twist of fate, I got moved up to Backup Team Lead and I think it's a really great opportunity :) It's like going back to where I was before in Accenture and in a matter of 2 months!

I'm optimistic about things and determined to tackle and challenges that lie ahead.

Hurting...

It hurts

Like a knife

Cutting through your heart


You don't know

How to stop the pain


Should you escape

Won't it follow you?


The world is upside down

Yet when the orbs meet

it's not magic but chaos

On the Flip Side

On the flip side, my 'pampered' upbringing and the challenge that i face right now has made me come to terms on what I want to be in the next 5 years or so: I will be RICH!

That's Thought level 10! Feelings, Action and Results will follow with the same level of passion.

There's no sense worrying about cooking your own meal when you can afford to hire someone hehehe.

Change Change Change

A deep feeling such as this definitely deserves a post in my 'real' and one and only blog...

There have been so many changes and events in my life lately...so many realizations and eye-opening experiences regarding life...

I remember back in grade school my friends and I were chatting in the corridor while waiting for the teacher to inspect our uniform...one of my friends said that her parents spank her using a bamboo stick, another one joined the conversation and said that her parents used a belt; I, on the other hand said that I was never spanked by my parents.

At that time, I thought I was lucky that I was not spanked by my parents; but now, I realized that I was not as fortunate as my classmates were.

A child who was never disciplined by his parents is going to have a very hard time in the real world...and that's exactly how I'm doing -- having a hard time.

I've been pampered my entire life, this is of course under my parents assumption that they will be able to continue to provide all the luxuries I was used to when I was a kid until before I leave their house. As you've already guessed, that assumption was wrong. Businesses go bankrupt and money disappears.

It was a very very slow process of learning for me... the very first thing I remember giving up was airconditioning. And I did this not by myself but through the influence of a friend.

Next things were about transportation.

First there was no more driver.. then no more car.. then my bro drove me...i eventually learned to ride a jeep but only the ayala loop jeep...next came the MRT but from Shang to Ayala only and not always...then jeep from Kartek to Sea Oil to ride with Arvin...

Then more recently, I've finally mustered up whatever inside me to commute going home: Walk from Philam Life Tower to the MRT Station @ SM. I even bought a stored value card to signify that I'll be doing this on a daily basis. Squeeze myself into the train to get to Santolan/Annapolis Station, then squeeze myself out. Walk towards Crame and to 1st avenue where the San Juan bound jeeps are. Aldrich meets me somewhere along Crame and we ride home together.

It may seem easy for 'normal' people but it is by far the biggest feat that I've accomplished.

Just a few hours ago, Aldrich and I cooked pancakes and he cooked some more of his breakfast food to eat. I washed some dishes and set the table. We sat down and started eating the pancakes. Then it suddenly dawned on me...Is this how life would be once I'm out of my parents house?

I had to cook so I'd have something to eat! And my pancakes didn't even meet up to my standards. I wanted to cry. Why is life so hard? Why is it so hard for me?

I felt that I was grossly unprepared for the 'real world' whereas other people have been immersed in it ever since. I was living in a bubble and now the bubble has disappeared completely.

I'm in the middle of the Rich Dad, Poor Dad book by Robert Kiyosaki and also attended a Cash Flow 101 workshop. From these I learned that schools do not give us any financial knowledge in order to make money work for us and not the other way around.

Sigh. So many things that I have to catch up on! Well, as they say, better late than never!