03.26.03
Oh the joy of summer vacation!
It's 12:30 am and I just got home from Galleria without a worry about classes, requirements, teachers, etc. for tomorrow! After my final exam in History, I went straight to Oli's house and celebrated my new found freedom: summer vacation! I went with Oli to school then we had dinner at Galleria--KFC, played billiards, got coffee at Starbucks and watched the Banger Sisters. Unexpectedly, it was a pretty good movie. You know, one of those feel-good movies that also makes you think about life. Well, the message was BE TRUE TO YOURSELF.

I has so much fun that's why I'm writing about it now. I guess the prospect of being able to go out and get home late and that I have the entire summer ahead of me to do lots and lots of stuff gives me some kind of excitement and exhilaration--a certain kind of rush that I can't explain.

Pulling my feet back to the ground
Of course, nothing is perfect which is why I still can't feel the complete "jouissance" or unbridled rush for that matter. What holds me back is the thought of my grades and having the lowest QPI ever in my entire stay in Ateneo. Here are my grade scenarios.

WORST: Theo D; Philo C+; History C; Prod B+; PR B+; giving me a total QPI of 2.5!!! Ohmigosh it's horrible!

BEST but realistic: Theo C; Philo B; History B; Prod A; PR A; good enough for a QPI of 3.2. But it's still sad because I usually get 3.3 something…oh well

Do you know that I texted our Philo teaching assistant to find out where to submit the typewritten notes for the class to pull up my grades just to find out that they had already finished deliberating the final marks! Aaargh! I typed my notes from November 12, 2002 to January 16, 2003 already! What a waste, oh well.

I really wish, hope, pray that a miracle will happen and the BEST scenario will come out of my grades or kahit the PWEDE na scenario which is Theo C; Philo B; History C+; Prod B+, PR A which totals to 3.0. At least a 3.0 pretty please!!! Having a 2 something QPI is so freshman! Boohoo! I have to endure around 2 more weeks of agonizing for the verdict: April 11 is the grade distribution date.

Of baking and broadcasting…
There's really so much I want to do and accomplish this summer vacation but I'm not sure if I want to think about them coz I don't want to be disappointed. You know, planning and hoping then none of them comes true. Well, they say that hoping has no charge so I might as well think about it.

Basically, most of my plans are listed down in my previous entry--about the things that I must and should do. Additionally, I also want to improve my baking skills by trying out new stuff, enrolling in short courses for baking and also learn how to cook. Hey, you never know when you might need it!

I also vow to myself to get serious with working out at the gym and reach my ideal size and weight. I guess the weight doesn't matter as much as the size coz the size is what other people see. People won't come up to you ask your weight but they will check you out and see if your body is proportioned. I think I really, really need to do this not merely for vanity or self-fulfillment but for my work as well. Modeling is obvious but it's only a sideline; what's more important is my hoping to land a job as a broadcast journalist.

I admit that I'm not so bright and skilled as maybe Jessica Soho is or Mel Tiangco (whom I really admire) so I guess I have to play on my assets for an edge. I can be hardworking, yes, and I can look good on camera, the only worry I have is if I'm good enough. Am I journalist material, am I witty enough, am I skilled enough, do I have that x-factor thing that makes one click with the audience? I'm really unsure about myself on this level that's why I want to enroll in workshops to hone my skills. I need that confidence, not the empty cocky one but the one that brings out the best in you.

Lucky to still be a Student
Hay, the world after graduation seems to be such a scary place. Those graduates that I know keep on telling me how they miss being students and how lucky I am to still be studying. Primarily because there is still such a thing as summer vacation and the fact that you can always haggle with teachers and be irresponsible once in a while and simply make up for it next time. I guess the workplace requires a lot more responsibility and discipline than being a student could ever need. Wow, this is really scary. I hope that I'll be able to make it there and survive!