04.30.03
Still Unhappy with Practicum

I've already gone to 2 tapings and 2 pre-production meetings but i'm still unhappy with my practicum. Do you know that we now have to follow a schedule? Mine is

• Monday 2:00 pm- 8:00 pm
  Tuesday 7:00 am- 12:00 mn
  Wednesday 2:00 pm- 8:00 pm
  Thursday 7:00 am- 12:00 mn

Okay, you'd probably say that it's good since i don't have a weekend sked, but it's not good because there's still practicum on those days, i'm just not available. I wish i just had a 9-5 job. I'd like it better that way. Although i go home relatively earlier than my practicum mates during tapings (they go home pack-up time, around 3:00 am in the morning), i still don't like it! Imagine, going home at 12 midnight! It's like i don't have a life, it's much worse than when i had classes!

IN THE FIRST PLACE, i don't want to be in production! People there are saying that it's a test of whether we think we can stand the rigors of production, but hello it doesn't apply to me coz i want to be ON CAM not behind it! I really wish they just place me in the NEWS department or ask me to write or to research! Dior's friend who's in the news dept said that although they were mostly asked to edit the newscast, they pick up some tips on how to make newscasts and what it requires.


This is SAD. Now, i'm wondering if i'd learn more if i had my practicum in ABS-CBN? Or if i had my practicum at COSMO or PINK or CHALK? I GUESS I'D NEVER KNOW...

Sometimes, i think i might just be sourgraping but i really don't feel at ease and i really don't like having this kind of practicum! I don't have time for anything! I don't even know if i like to go into broadcasting with the erratic schedule and all! Maybe i'll just put up my own business. I hate erratic schedules! And i heard that CCA has one, too. How sad. Modeling has the same erratic sched but at least i get paid! But still..why is it that the things i'm into require erratic schedules? BOOHOo, am i doomed for life?

i wonder if i should just go into something that would simply require a desk job, a 9-5 air conditioned office job???? i don't know! My mind is in a jumble now and i have to wake up at 3:30 because pull-out time to go to the taping tom is 4:30 am! Shooting is at Pila, Laguna coz that's where the church for Carlos Miguel and Rosemarie's wedding will be....Sigh.

Being a bridesmaid in the wedding tomorrow is not enough to cheer me up....sigh.